Thelsim

A slipknot works great! It’s done in a second and easily undone as well.

That last one is making a run for it :)

Maybe not as fancy as the others, but I really like the little pink jeep. It’s boxy and cute.

Clearly that’s for gaining the high ground 🙄

God, I miss test listens. My favorite record store was very easy going in this, they'd happily let me stand there listening to most of the CD. The unspoken rule was that if you spend that much time listening, you're going to buy it anyway.
One of the few shops where I always felt welcome.

*sniff* I always get emotional when people find their soulmate

Ohhh… The Girl From Ipanema, Nat King Cole version.
Perfect for a warm summer night’s drive. Not sure about the other 27 minutes though.

More like a long but tormented life of barely subsisting on the smallest amounts of water possible.
Death is too sweet and quick for my houseplants :)

I keep reading this as Criminally Sexy Pork.

Remember: even a moderately sexy pork chop is illegal to sell

I’m going to avoid all controversy and just make the g silent. It’s ‘if from now on.
If I say it fast enough, people will just assume I use their version.

Or what’s even worse, when you only remember half the name and keep wondering if you heard “Eve” or “Eva” and just mumble your way through pronouncing their name every time.

I don’t care if we are, that one is funny in it’s own right :)

I’m not letting this bastard get anywhere near my other utensils.
He’s got a nice quiet space, together with all the other misfits.

Only during pride month (I wish that was a joke)