Lol, Edith and Mildred are literally my grandmothers’ names. Edith is a badass and just turned 99.

Damn me neither

This is the same fucking thing. It is simultaneously 12:25am MDT and 6:25am GMT where I live. If you ask my computer what time it is, it knows it is 06:25:00-06:00.

Two sides of the same coin buddy.

What you’re describing is LITERALLY the system we have. UTC is a global, coordinated time that tracks solar time to a precision of less than a second. As far as my computer is concerned, my time is UTC (technically GMT, but they both refer to the same time) minus 6 hours. We all could choose to say, “hey, wanna meet for dinner at 3AM?” and have that be a normal thing to say in my area, and an odd thing to say odd in Europe… but nobody wants that.

How stoned are you right now

I’m imagining something more fluid, where the time it is depends on exactly where you’re standing and the position of the sun in relation to it. You’d need to factor the direction you’re traveling as well as the distance whenever you went anywhere. We’d have a lot more intimate relationship with our current celestial situation.

I think they’re proposing personal time zones, where every individual’s clock shows their precise solar time, and nobody ever manages to be on time to work ever again.

I bet they’re always on your lawn too

You are right, of course. There are things we can’t condone. But you realize that by saying it you sound exactly like the “all lives matter” response to BLM: technically correct, but oblivious to the context in which the original statement arises. When we say Palestinian lives matter, we aren’t saying Israeli lives don’t. We’re saying that you have forgotten that Palestinian lives even matter at all.

I think they were referring to alien consipracists, who much like flat earthers believe in a global hoax committed by the elite (read: Jews and Liberals) to keep us misinformed on the true nature of our reality (for some reason). In that way they are very much cut from the same cloth.